Grace, and a guy named Charlie.
When I was very young – still in diapers, in fact – my brother, sister and I spent countless hours being passed around from one set of arms to the next at the original Dwarf House while our Mom sat at the counter and talked to Dad. In those days, if she didn’t spend time with him at the restaurant, she hardly spent time with him at all. The Dwarf House was in operation 24 hours a day, six days a week, and Dad was there almost all the time.
I didn’t know the terms “employee” or “employer” back in those days. I knew the names Dad, Annie, Selma, Charlie, Mr. Long, Henry and so on. These people were my family, and I loved them all very much. Over the years, I got to know more and more about the people I had grown up with and I began to realize that they all had stories of their own.
One such story is that of Charlie Selock. One morning, when I was a teenager, my Dad and I were on the roof of the restaurant checking on something (perhaps a leaky shingle or one of the refrigeration units, I can’t recall) when we noticed several empty beer cans scattered around. I remember the look on my Dad’s face, and I immediately felt sorry for him because he seemed so disappointed. We descended the ladder without a word and then I watched my Dad approach our night manager, Charlie.
I had known Charlie all my life. He had worked for the Dwarf House for almost 20 years. I wasn’t sure what was about to happen, but my heart sank at the thought of him not being around every day. I wondered what he was going to do after he got fired. But that didn’t happen.
It turns out that Charlie had been struggling with addiction to alcohol for quite some time, and instead of firing him or making a scene, my Dad helped Charlie find the real help he needed. Dad had all of the evidence, cause and legal justification for firing Charlie and sending him on his way, but instead he chose compassion.
He chose grace.
I learned so much about life, business and relationships from that experience with Charlie. Dad handled the situation with respect and love, and it made all the difference. Charlie quickly found the help he needed, and then ended up coming back to work for the Dwarf House. He retired nearly 10 years later.
Investing in the lives of others is how we grow. Sometimes that means having to meet people where they are in order to help get them to where they need to be. Sometimes it brings pain, sadness and disappointment… but that is what we have been called to do, and that is precisely where grace comes in.
You know, the funny thing about grace is the more we give it to others, the more we realize just how much has been given to us. We all need it… every day. Grace is forgiveness. Grace is kindness. Grace is compassion. Grace is understanding. Grace is empathy. Grace is real. And grace is the only way I have ever known to truly love people for who they are.
Author, Anne Lamott, once gave a great comment about grace. She said, “I do not at all understand the mystery of grace – only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us.”
I think Charlie would agree. Do you?
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